A Prayer Closet Moment

His healing power is in me
There is life in me to give
His power to set people free flows through me
When will I stop closing it off?
When will I just let it flow?

Like a faucet
All I have to do is open up
And His rivers of healing water will flow out …
Wherever and whenever He wants it to

I don’t need to explain it
I don’t need to defend it
I certainly can’t control it
But I HAVE to be willing to release it
I have to stop shutting off the faucet
With fear and unbelief –
“God, I know you CAN I just don’t think you WILL”

Who’s in charge here?
And how much am I willing to be a fool
So He can receive even more glory?
What if I stop focusing on the outcome
And start living in simple love?
What if it isn’t about performance
But simply believing like a child?

I don’t know how
I don’t know all the details
But He will take care of you
Because my Daddy is GOOD!”

Not manipulating God…
Not trying to force His hand
There is danger for me
If He answers that kind of prayer
The way I want
Just declaring that He is good
And letting Him work
The same freedom
He worked in my life

But, Christianity is GOOD News!

I had wonderful intentions of blogging on a regular basis, but I ended up shutting down for a while. Part of it was a little bit of burnout and having a hard time putting the words down (more on that another time), and part of it was shrinking back from the recent hailstorm of hatred for all things Christian. It seemed to be coming from all angles, and the venom was so strong that I was stunned silent.

But I’m not going to be silent any more. I’m not going to shrink back. I’m over the initial shock and I’m ready to start talking about Jesus and the amazing things He has done in my life, because the Gospel is GOOD news!

Don’t believe me? The Bible says that when Jesus officially began His ministry, He announced His job description:

So He came to Nazareth, where He had been brought up. And as his custom was, He went into the synagogue on the Sabbath day, and stood up to read. And He was handed the book of the prophet Isaiah. And when He had opened the book He found the place where it was written:

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed, to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord.”

And He began to say to them, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.” (Luke 4:16-19, 21).

He was reading Isaiah 61:1-2a. He stopped at a comma though. Isaiah 62:2b continues with, “and the vengeance of our God.” That’s coming later, during His second coming, but right now we are living in the time before the comma. We are in the time of healing, liberty, recovery, and grace!

This is exactly what He has done in my life. I KNOW what I was. I KNOW what destruction I was capable of. I was so proud of my ability to make my own path, achieve my own thing. It didn’t matter if I ran over people in the process. So what if people got hurt … they shouldn’t have been in my way in the first place. I managed my life into a total mess. I talked a good talk and did my best to convince myself that I was having a blast and really succeeding in life, but that was just to cover up the miserable feeling I had way, way, way, deep down inside. And I was digging myself deeper and deeper into a pit. I SHOULD have been an alcoholic. I SHOULD have been through several failed marriages by now. I SHOULD have died a couple of times.

But He saved me! He set me free of so many problems and so many wounds that I had brought upon myself. He healed my physically, He healed me emotionally, and He finally brought total peace to that spot way, way, way down deep inside. It turns out that the deep spot is literally the core of ME, and it’s finally ok. I’m finally free to choose to NOT sin. I’m finally on a path that is leading to BETTER places! I’m not perfect, but I’m changing day by day. The change is NOT coming by following a bunch of rules. I’m changing from the INSIDE! My heart and my “want to” is changing.

We as Christians don’t always get it right. When you give your heart to Jesus your spirit is saved, but then the soul (mind/will/emotions) go through a process of change over time, as you spend more time growing in God. Some go after this with all their strength, some get stuck along the way, and some never even start the process. But people, churches, or even denominations behaving badly don’t change who Jesus is!

I’m finally a slave to something that is infinitely good, infinitely loving, and infinitely FOR me, and I don’t apologize for that. Let’s start showing people the GOOD news!

Hello world!

Well, I finally took the plunge and started a blog. This blog will be about Jesus and about my Christian walk. Read on if you’d like…

My Christian walk has been … eventful. I grew up in the church, but I didn’t give my life completely to the Lord until I was 15 years old. In college, however, God became less and less a part of my life, and I slowly walked away from God entirely. It was during this time of the “self-made me” that I managed to make a HUGE mess of myself. When I was at my lowest point, God decided to save me all over again. He saved me when I wasn’t worth saving, and I adore Him for it!

Maybe other Christians have attained near-perfection from the moment they got saved, but I certainly have not. In fact, I think I am in the process of making every mistake that could possibly be made. But God has never failed to give me forgiveness, mercy, guidance, correction, and unconditional love. I have also discovered that the PROCESS of growing up spiritually has been just as important as the end result. All of life, therefore, has become quite an adventure with God!

As I have shared my ups and downs, several people have urged me to write it them down. After much prayer, I think it is time to do just that. I know this blog is not for everybody, but for those of you who love the Lord and are trying to grow up in all things God, maybe this can be a blog where we can learn from and encourage each other. I don’t have any special qualifications. I just love the Lord with all my heart and I’m wanting to be a REAL person who is communicating with other REAL people. Through the good, the bad, and the ugly, we need each other!